Our dilemma is that we hate change and love it at the same time; what we really want is for things to remain the same but get better.
Sidney J. Harris (famous US journalist 1917-1986)
Ain’t that the truth!
So, what’s so important about habits? (today is my Health focus day so I’ll start there)
One of the major “weight loss and maintenance” gurus is Susan Peirce Thompson, author of “Bright Line Eating: The Science of Living Happy, Thin and Free”. The foreword to her book sets our stage here – “Why is it that, when it comes to food, so many people are unable to consistently act in their own best interests? Why is it that so many accomplished, caring, and intelligent people are eating their way to misery and premature death?”
John Robbins, in the foreword, goes on to explain: as a neuroscientist, Susan Peirce Thompson has spent decades studying this problem. She’s an Adjunct Associate Professor of Brain and Cognitive Sciences at the University of Rochester, President of the Institute for Sustainable Weight Loss, and founder and CEO of Bright Line Eating Solutions. Robbins states she has “actually cracked the code.”
I did participate in her program and got to know it pretty well. She sets out “Bright Lines” (interpret those as “rules”). My main point to extract here is that she uses the word “automaticity” to indicate having built a habit so it works automatically.
And that is great! But, what if your “habit” creating ability falls in line with most people’s New Year Resolutions? Like – not happening – for very long, at least.
So I moved along with my inquiry – staying in the health realm for now. Search online – right? Yep – I get lots of hits – representative is this one from Cleveland Clinic’s blog “11 Simple Health Habits Worth Adopting Into Your Life”.
Not that they are bad or crazy – they make sense. Such as:
Use stairs and furniture as makeshift gym equipment and exercise regularly – Drink 1 extra glass of water a day – replace diet soda with carbonated mineral water and then move to fruit-infused plain water because “quitting cold turkey isn’t realistic” – take a 10-minute walk – correct your posture by leaving notes to self until it becomes “an unconscious habit” – go to bed ½ hour earlier and get solid 7-8 hours most nights – etc. etc. etc.
Okay – I can hear you! But I don’t…but I can’t…but I tried that…etc. Me, too!
So have you ever followed down the path of “If I can understand the why, surely then I could do it”? Illustrative is a blog by Agatha Singer titled “Why Are Healthy Habits Important? Because They Make Life Worth Living!” – you might respond as I did with “duh, of course, but that ain’t makin’ it happen for me”.
She had good reasoning such as how it benefits your mental health and your weight management plus reduces the risk of chronic diseases, even improves longevity and boosts energy. Who doesn’t want those? But…here we are again. You have to make it a HABIT!
Enough teasing – here’s my point and key recommendation. This is Gretchen Rubin’s quote:
Habits are like the invisible architecture of daily life – research suggests that about 40% of our existence is shaped by our habits….some strategies work very well for some people, and not for others, and some strategies are available to us at some times in our lives, but not at other times.
But here is her bottom line quote that I love, and which I think “nails it”:
There is no magic, one-size-fits-all solution to changing habits. It turns out that it’s not that hard to change your habits — when you do it in the way that’s right for you. To change your habits, it’s crucial to identify your Tendency.
Not only do I so-so-so agree with her that it is not a one-size-fits-all solution, I found her information so helpful not only in understanding myself (and my habit-making issues) but in understanding my husband and others around me. Their making or breaking of habits truly impacts my life as well! Plus I need to learn how to live with them and help them “make or break” in addition to doing my own education and adjustment work on the same.
So – here you go: I truly encourage you to take her quick quiz to find out which of the 4 tendencies you are (Upholder, Questioner, Obliger or Rebel). She gives you the link after quickly explaining it in her blog – you will need a bit of the background in the blog first.
I promise you will be intrigued at the least and perhaps greatly enlightened and encouraged. It has been an extremely helpful tool for me to have identified my Tendency and used her information. Her blog is titled “Want to Change an Important Habit? Tips for Upholders, Questioners, Obligers & Rebels” and you can find it HERE
By the way, you might entice your spouse or family members to take the quiz as well.
We had a bit of fun with it. I had read her book and studied up on the Tendencies (because I think she nails some important truths there), so when my husband looked at the 4 tendencies and started to take the quiz, he mentioned he had no clue what he might be. I wrote down my expectation of his “Tendency” and turned the paper over until he was through. He still was clueless, but when I gave him the paper (and it was his Tendency), he was shocked and laughed that it was so obvious to me.
As for me – she nailed exactly the strategies and points that were most important for my Tendency – and me, personally. I found it truly helpful.
I pray you also will be blessed by it. And can put it to work in your life. By the way, I did find it fitting that her book was titled “Better than Before” when I looked at the quote that began this blog.
