In 1973, I moved with my husband and our 1-year-old child to Pueblo, Colorado. I was 27 years old and worked part-time as an investigator for the District Attorney. Pueblo was small enough that we trained with the police department and had a small staff of investigators.
Since I was the only female, I was assigned to the sexual assault and child abuse cases. My sheltered “growing up on a farm” life was accelerated in maturity and worldly education at frightening speed by what I witnessed.
In the middle of my 5 years there, I took a year off to have my second child. I was totally tenderized by my precious little ones. And I struggled mightily with those in my caseload who harmed children, including their own.
So I was ripe for embracing the slogan “Love Carefully, PLAN Parenthood” on a bumper sticker distributed by the Pueblo Planned Parenthood. My mother-in-law volunteered at their clinic, as did I upon her recommendation – it was a health-type clinic serving mostly lower income women and teens. I so wanted every child to be valued and loved. And the nurse who ran the clinic was a wonderful person.
In January, 1973, Roe v. Wade was decided by the U.S. Supreme Court. In my experience with bearing children in the early 70’s – we had no ultrasound, no real knowledge of what part of the baby was developing when, and generally had only “wives’ tales” type of education. The strapped on ‘monitor’ was just coming out for measuring heartbeats as women were close to delivery. Pretty limited pregnancy evaluation. And yes, back-alley abortions occurred before and after Roe in my workload.
Maybe my idealistic and hopeful thinking encouraged my involvement, but somehow I ended up on a local Planned Parenthood board for the Pueblo clinic a few years later. I remember attending a regional type of meeting in Denver – and the topic at hand. It was dividing the organization into two parts – separating out the abortion clinics because their income was so high (which harmed fundraising) and it was disturbing many religious donors (also harming fundraising).
As I look back, there was no discussion by anyone in my peer group, or even in public debate forums that caught my attention, raising concern about abortion. I did not know anyone in my social world who had one – it was just not discussed. There were no marches or movements, to my knowledge. And the abortions about which I knew were in my workload – and not pretty. No alarm bells were going off for me with regard to abortion.
Fast forward – as a single mom, I moved with my boys to Denver to attend and then graduate from law school in 1987. I started practicing as a litigator and returned to church attendance. Though I was saved at the age of 8, my walk with the Lord began as an adult when I joined this church.
Jumping ahead a bit more. In 1999, while with a Christian law firm in Denver, I was approached by a group from northern Colorado who supported pregnancy care clinics. They needed an attorney helping in the legislative process for a proposed ballot initiative. I agreed and learned lots along the way.
Their initiative was titled “Woman’s Right-to-Know Act” and essentially required a 24-hour waiting period after prescribed information was provided to a woman by medically trained personnel before an abortion could be performed.
In preparing for the legislative process, I heard many testimonies from women and learned much about the subject. But nothing prepared me for the insight the Lord had in store for me.
Of course, the ballot initiative we got approved in the process was challenged at the Colorado Supreme Court level on a technical matter – having to adhere to just one subject. I was in my office, working on this case, when a woman friend who had moved to New Mexico called me.
She was much younger than I, but when we met at church, we hit it off and enjoyed a good friendship. She was single but had recently moved back to help her parents. When she called, she started off with a “what are you doing…” kind of question. Of course, I told her about the case and what I was drafting – and just the bare bones of it all.
It surprised me how silent she was in response. And then, she spoke softly and I could tell she was tearful – she started with “I have never told anyone this….” She then shared the horror story of her going to get an abortion because the guy would not support her. As she was on the table, before the procedure started, she said she changed her mind. They would not stop – told her the decision was made and in writing and they proceeded. She had lived with the scars, in silence, for years.
We had a cleansing and good talk, but her story impacted me hugely. The pain was evident – and I then began to understand why she had not dated, or done any of the dating social scene, while she was in Denver.
Yes, my views on the abortion issue have evolved far beyond my initial exposures in Pueblo. I found in the last several years that my choice of candidates involved that being the first issue on which I made my decision.
So, when the recent Supreme Court decision in the Dobbs case overturned Roe v. Wade, I was in a celebratory place – along with many friends and other Christians.
Yet a friend’s forwarding of a blog brought me up short. As a Christian.
The title “After Roe, Choose Compassion over Culture War” intrigued me, but the story told by James Forsyth, the author, was riveting.
“I’m pregnant” were his girlfriend’s words which left him in shock. They were teenagers, still living in their parents’ homes. They were kids ….wondering “What on earth should we do next?”
Their first step was to go to the doctor. As he says, “Here our shock, fear, and despair were confirmed.” Then the doctor offered a way out. “You know, you could have an abortion.”
Forsyth’s next paragraph is poignant:
How I wish I could now write about our deep commitment to life, of how we rejected the suggestion immediately and boldly blazed a different path. But that’s not what hopeless teenagers do. When you have no options, abortion feels like a solution.
The best thing he did for me was pose the next question: After the Roe v. Wade ruling, what now?
As we welcome this ruling, he reminds us that as Christians, we must be measured in our response. This is not the time for the church “to beat its chest in celebration of a victory in the culture war. This is a moment for us to step up in love.” Oh my, did I need to hear that !
I will give you the link as you would appreciate his full blog. But I won’t leave you hanging about what he suggests “step up in love” might look like. He gave three suggestions that I think we should all roll around in our heads and hearts and be ready to engage.
- Disarm with compassion. As access to abortion becomes more limited, more women will find themselves in crisis – in the “shock, fear and despair” he described. These women are not and have never been the enemy – our heart toward them must be loving. He exhorts us to be like Jesus – show women in crisis the same compassion Christ has shown us.
- Act personally. So many Christians in America work tirelessly and heroically to care for unwanted children, provide for single mothers, and love those in distress. But we should not pat ourselves on the back – instead, we should redouble our efforts….reach out to foster and adoption agencies, consider fostering or adopting yourself, and find ways to offer practical support for families in your church who’ve done so. Support pro-life ministry like lives depend on it. He says it well – “Now it’s time for each of us to act.”
- Organize corporately. He encourages us to “get our houses of worship in order” and put structures for mercy ministry in place so those with needs receive prompt attention and care. Cover rent, buy groceries and diapers, and host events to pamper single moms. Build friendships so no one is left isolated or alone.
I loved his closing thoughts about love coming through Christ’s body – his ever-so-beautiful church. And this should be our response to the Supreme Court’s ruling – Christ’s compassion embodied for a hurting world.Ya gotta read his full blog –HERE
