Attitudes do not just happen: we CHOOSE them.
Henry Blackaby, Experiencing God Day by Day, hit me with this statement recently – and the timing (end of year, look back time, set goals for next year) was right when I needed it.
But I was about to brush it off with a glance just thinking “ain’t it true” and moving on to other subjects. Darn, I read the whole devotional and he really nailed me. Timing? Perfect.
We just had Christmas where we read sections of Luke 2 and Matthew 2 to share the full story of celebration of Christ’s birth. But he added some points to consider:
- Jesus was born in a cattle shed
- He slept in a feeding trough
- His life was spent preparing for the day when He would suffer an excruciating execution
But consider this – Jesus, as part of the trinity of God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, held the position of sitting at the right hand of God the Father. No position is more glorious.
And yet, he chose not to hold on to his right to stay in the privileged position. He didn’t argue that he should not have to suffer for the sins of rebellious creatures of dust, says Blackaby. Rather, he relinquished the glory of his heavenly existence in order to become a man. All of this he did willingly.
Choices – not excuses. Whether we do something about a problem or make an excuse about why we don’t – that is our choice. Our attitude about life, about situations, about moment-by-moment frame of mind – all are a matter of choice.
That is so hard for me to swallow. I don’t want to be responsible for the results, I think. Or I could be backing off because it is just going to be hard work.
Ok, I go back to Blackaby’s directional path (scripture) after he gets my attention with these hard sayings. He points to Philippians 2:5: “Make your own attitude that of Christ Jesus.”
Holy Mackerel! That feels totally impossible and unreachable. Easy for Blackaby to say because he knows all of scripture so well. But me? Ugh. Not to mention how often my thoughts and behaviors are NOT Christlike – and I don’t even have to search hard in scripture to prove it.
So, what am I to do? Well, I’ll give Blackaby this credit – he does not leave you wondering!
He knew that as soon as he got me to crack open my Bible to Philippians 2:5, I would keep reading and find the very next scriptures (v. 6-8) which answered my quandry of how to have the attitude of Christ:
- Humility – Christ did not use His equality with God for His own advantage but emptied Himself assuming the external form of a slave (becoming human)
- Obedience – to the point of death on a cross for our sins
So — I could smugly dismiss these points saying “no way am I like Christ”! I am not equal with God and I am not needing to die on a cross to save the world from their sins.
But in previous verses (v. 3-4) Paul prevented my diversionary tactics by stating clearly that if I had any encouragement from my Christian faith, I would focus on one goal. “Do nothing out of rivalry or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves. Everyone should look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.”
BAM! Up popped my many years of experience with conflict resolution. In Christian settings, court settings, family settings, wherever they occurred – getting a party in the conflict to be humble and to consider others MORE important than themself was NOT EASY and RARELY DONE without prompting and soul-searching work.
In fact, that was the major plowing of the heart type of work that needed to be done. It often did help to seek out the scripture and remember the humility Christ exhibited for our benefit – the reality of our low “position” (zippo for most of us) should bring us proper perspective. And that Christ died for us not only puts full perspective on it, it also well demonstrates how to consider the interests of others above our own.
Do you hear the echoes of our worldly advice-givers? Take care of yourself; don’t be a doormat; you deserve X or Y (blah, blah, blah)….
Those could bring us into conflict with these scriptures – there’s another choice to be made!
And then came the encouraging specifics in v. 12-14 – these got personal because they were directed at my human life on this earth:
- ‘work out your own salvation with fear and trembling’ – ok, I am already there
- ‘for it is God who is working in you, enabling you…’ – now THAT is good news
- ‘do everything without grumbling and arguing…faultless in a crooked and perverted generation…’
How did Paul know writing this about A.D. 53 how MY life would be so full of things to grumble and argue about – not even getting into the crooked and perverted generation stuff?
We are tempted to hold tightly to things God has given us. We make little gods of so many things – money, position of authority, comfort, respect (as defined by us), possessions, etc. Want a good book on how this happens? Read Tim Keller’s Counterfeit Gods.
Blackaby sums it all up — “If you find yourself resisting every time God seeks to adjust your life to his will, ask the spirit to give you the same selfless attitude that Jesus demonstrated.”
Yes, it is not the “easy” path. It may mean you have to face some fears (it’s so hard, uncomfortable, humiliating, just to name a few). Remember that humility combined with obedience was the key to understanding Christ’s attitude. And I will hang on to His promise in v. 13 that He is working in me and with me for good purpose.
Want a “memorable” picture to help with this CHOICE thing? A recent TV series we were watching mentioned it and made me look it up. The hero person asked another “which dog are you feeding?” This saying was new to me so I had to look up the history and meaning. There are a few.
I like the Chinese proverb theory which quotes it as “There is a good dog and a bad dog fighting within each of us. The one that is going to win is the one we feed the most.”
It reminds us that we impact our destiny, our character and our lives by the choices we make – which dog we feed. As a Christian, I see the Satanic evil vs. Godly good struggle in it. One source added an excellent point – when we make poor choices, they always have a price tag attached.
All this is boiling down to a big point for me as I am bringing my Journey Well: Heart, Body & Soul business to a launch soon. There is “choice” popping up everywhere in people’s lives, especially in the 3 different areas on which I focus in journeying through this life.
As I struggled to define my role, I settled on serving others as a guide who may be just a little further down the road. Like a coach, which is the more popular type of help people search out these days.
As stated by habits expert Gretchen Rubin, “Self-measurement brings self-awareness, and self-awareness strengthens our self-control.” Most people would not practice self-measurement without external accountability (like what a coach provides).
So the first “choice” in my offers will be in which area someone wants a product or coach: I propose there are 3 different areas that are common to us all which begin to break down or need help somewhere along our journey. What is interesting is that I have found in each area, the choice to get help is often delayed until it is causing a problem or pain:
Soul (reconciling relationships) – in my experience, people didn’t pay attention to conflict until they were in the middle of one. And it was not going well.
Body (health & nutrition) – while there was some interest in preventive health measures, people are not really ready to do something about it until they are experiencing a body part or system breaking down.
Heart (photos & stories) –yes, the same is true about photos. We like them, treasure them, and the stories, but we don’t really get kicked into action to preserve and value them until we have either lost some precious ones or almost lost them. Or can’t find the ones we need or want or wonder if anyone has kept photos of the ancestors – and where can we get them? Etc.
First choice is which of the 3 areas is calling for attention most loudly but the second choice is a test of whether it is enough of a problem so that you are ready to make a choice to act. Then the question that kicks in is “do I have the attitude of Christ?” in the midst of the problem. Need a little coaching or guidance on those? It’s coming – meanwhile you have the tools in this blog to get you started down the path. I’m rooting for you!!
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